I Will Greet This Day With a Forgiving Spirit ~ The Compassionate Decision

We spent some time with a compassionate man this week at the Team Challenge...Abraham Lincoln. His compassion changed the course of history.  He taught us about the gift of forgiveness.

In his classic book An Enemy Called Average, John Mason writes, "When faced with the decision to forgive, never make the excuse, 'But no one knows what that person did to me.'
"That may be true," he says, "but the question is, do you know what unforgiveness will do to you?"

What does unforgiveness do to us? Have you ever experienced the mental illusions that life has you cornered? Have you ever felt boxed in, discouraged, controlled by outside circumstances? Andy Andrews has determined over the years that there is generally someone you haven't forgiven or someone who you haven't asked for their forgiveness.  The persons name sticks in the back of your mind, as if subconsciously tapping you on the shoulder, diverting your focus from where it should be.

There is a story an old Indian man tells his grandson about a fight going on inside between two wolves. One wolf was evil and full of anger, envy, greed, arrogance, self pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, and ego. The other wolf was a good wolf, full of forgiveness.
The grandson asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?" The old man simply replied, "The one I feed."

Most likely, as you read these words, there is a fight going on inside of you between those same two wolves. The fight is revealing itself to you as someone's name or a visual image of that face.  You can kill the wolf that contains all that anger, sorrow, regret, and resentment by embracing the good wolf and choosing forgiveness.

And then...there is one person you need to forgive that if you don't, your effectiveness as a wife, as a mother or father, as a friend or leader will suffer.  The key to bringing your dreams into reality is forgiveness, and specifically, forgiveness of this one person...that one person is you.

We have piled so much onto our own shoulders. There are many things we intended to do that we didn't do, so many promises we made but didn't keep, and so many goals we set that we didn't achieve. Over time they've piled up on us, and the weight can be crushing. You have to forgive yourself!

For many of us, our greatest enemies have been ourselves. Every mistake, every miscalculation, every stumble we make we replayed in our minds. When we disappoint ourselves, it sets in motion a continual cycle of disappointment.

Forgive yourself. Begin anew. The simple fact of forgiving yourself will change your life!

Forgiveness is a secret that is hidden in plain sight. it costs nothing and it's worth millions. It is available to everyone and used by few. If you harness the power of forgiveness, you will be sought after and regarded highly. And not coincidentally, you will also be forgiven by others! ~ A. Lincoln

Always encouraging you,
Letha

It's A Math Problem!

If you are an inactive person who weighs 200 pounds, every nutritional label in America is written for you! If not...they aren't!

I write this blog this morning anticipating spending time with my Healthy Weigh friends who are close to reaching their goal weight and are now learning what it takes to stay there. I'll be walking them through a process of stabilization; a 6 week process where you increase your calories week by week until you reach your calorie limit based on your goal weight.

Being highly effective people, we will begin with the end in mind, in this case goal weight. Each client will write down their ideal maintenance weight and then calculate their approximate calorie intake for that weight based on this chart.

Multiply your ideal maintenance weight by:

10 if you are inactive (sitting most of the day, no regular physical exercise)

11 if you are moderately active (sitting most of the day but do engage in physical exercise regularly or at least 3 to 4 times per week for 1/2 hour or more)

12 if you are active (standing and/ or walking most of the day and engage in regular physical exercise)

13 if you are very active (walking or involved in strenuous physical labor most of the day and engage in regular physical exercise)

That number is your approximate total calories to maintain your goal weight.

Now I know that there are many more complicated ways to estimate and discover your appropriate calorie intake for your goal weight...the truth is, you will find the same answer at the end of every story problem. I've done them!

So, you've done the math??? What's your number???

We'll have four or five men in our group. Only a couple of them will be able to eat 2000 calories to maintain their weight. Everyone else in the room  will range from 1250 calories to 1800. So why does every nutritional label in America say..."Based on a 2000 diet."? Good question! The only people that can and should be eating 2000 calories per day are men weighing close to 200 pounds, or a woman who weighs 155 and works in a job performing physical labor all day and then drops by the club to work out on the way home!

I've spent over 30 years helping people lose weight. I am proud to say that I administer one of the greatest weight loss programs available any where...but losing weight has never been the hard part. People knuckle down, eat less, move more, and then lose weight.

Keeping if off for life is the struggle. I believe that our nutritional labels aren't helping matters. It would make sense that most people in America would believe that they should eat 2000 calories...right? It says that on the back of every food label everywhere!!!

I read an article the other day in search of an answer to this problem. It said that 2000 calories per day was used as a standard because that is how many calories it would take to maintain the average American. Wow, how sad is that? What if our labels said "Based on a 1500 calorie diet?" What would the average American look like then?

I am a 120 pound 54 year old woman. I exercise 3 to 4 times a week for 1/2 or more. My maintenance calories are 1320. That's it...no more. No matter what a label says, I am responsible for consuming the amount of healthy calories that my body needs to maintain this healthy weight.

Do the math. Accept the truth. Be responsible. Reach your goal weight and keep it off for life...eating just the amount of calories that YOU need to maintain your ideal maintenance weight!

Always encouraging you...and hopefully enlightening you too,

Letha

Today I Choose to be Happy ~ The Joyful Decision

Anne Frank was our inspiration this week as we focused on happiness. Who would have thought that a 12 year old girl, living in fear for her life and having no creature comforts, would be the one to teach us about happiness. Even Anne Frank knew that happiness is a choice.


Andy Andrews, the author of The Travelers Gift, goes one more step with happiness, and talks about the magic of smiling! Andy says that our opportunities come from our associations. Our opportunities, our information and our knowledge are most likely to come from other people. If that's true (and it is...), then we must become people whom others want to be around.

People want to be around happy people, not moaners and groaners. Happy people get more opportunities because opportunities come from people, and people are attracted by happy people. Andy says, if you have to fake it initially, fake it! Nobody expects you to be happy every moment of every day. But you can choose to smile. Speak a little faster. Move. You will attract people and opportunities into your life when you become someone others want to be around.

Your smile is your calling card. It is the most potent weapon you have.  With your smile, you can forge bonds, break ice, and calm storms. Use your smile constantly. The power of who you are is revealed when you smile. Smiles are contagious. Smiles affect your biochemistry.

Here are a few quotes about smiles...see if they just don't make you smile!

People seldom notice your old clothes if you wear a smile ~ Lee Mildon

The shortest distance between two people is a smile ~ Author unknown

Today, give a stranger one of your smiles, it might be the only sunshine he sees all day. ~ H. Jackson Brown

Smile this weekend...see if it doesn't just make you feel happier...and draw people to you!

Always encouraging you,
Letha

I Have A Decided Heart ~ The Certain Decision

Christopher Columbus epitomizes a person with a decided heart. One of the characteristics of a person with a decided heart is that he owns his Decision. "If you're with me, fine; if you're not with me fine. I am going. I have a decided heart. You can come along for the ride or not. And if you're against me, I don't' care what you think or say." That summed up Christopher Columbus! He didn't care what anybody thought or said.

As you embark upon your journey with a decided heart, I can promise you that the clamor from your friends, family and doubters will roar.  It will amaze you!
The people that you thought would be on your side, but aren't, might be a larger group that you imagined.  If you worry about what other people think, you'll have more confidence in their opinion than you do your own.  Your future does not depend on the opinions or the permission of others.

If you're afraid of criticism, you'll have little impact on the world. Criticism runs rampant, and if you're inhibited by it, you'll drown in its deep waters. Any time you do something that goes against the crowd, you'll get feedback that doesn't support you.

I've been surprised over my life time at the lack of support people show and give to each other when things are going well.  Jealously, envy and insecurity are at the root of this kind of behavior.   You can't allow yourself to stay stuck in the past because the people close to you are afraid to let you grow.  When you have a decided heart, you are not affected by others.

No matter what the people in your circle of influence think or say about your growth and your change, you MUST know what you want and keep your eyes on your goal. I've noticed that the longer you work at your new life style, the more relaxed and supportive the people around you become.  I guess they know when they're dealing with a decided heart!

Own your Decision and keep pressing forward with a decided heart!

Always encouraging you,
Letha

I am a Person of Action ~ The Active Decision

This week we traveled back in time to the year 1863. We met with Colonel Joshua Chamberlain at Gettysburg.  Chamberlain gave the order to "CHARGE" when things looked pretty bleak! Historians have determined that, had Chamberlain not charged that day, the South would have won the war and that would have changed the course of American History. Joshua Chamberlain was a man of action and we learned a lot from him this week.

Too many people, when faced with a choice, lie down on the couch and watch TV. When the going gets tough, the tough don't necessarily get going.  The Active DECISION affirms; "I am a person of action. I seize this moment. I choose now!"

The person who chooses to act, makes a decision to create a new future instead of living in the past and dwelling on squandered time or lost opportunities. You can't do anything about your past, but your future lies before you. Grasp it with both hands and run with it! When you're faced with a choice to do nothing or do something, you should always choose to act. Choose now to seize this moment.

At The Healthy Weigh, be believe that your beliefs dictate your thoughts which dictate your feelings which dictate your actions.  However, sometimes you have to act your way into new beliefs. Acting "as if" can change the way you think which ultimately will change the way you live your life.

Without action, none of the other decisions are useful. You want to know who you are? Don't ask, Act.  When you have a choice to do nothing or to do something..."do something." Become a person of action.

Always encouraging you,
Letha

I Will Seek Wisdom ~ The Guided Decision

We are on our second DECISION of our journey through The Travelers Gift... "I Will Seek Wisdom."  We learned this week that there is a big difference between knowledge and wisdom.  Knowledge is the awareness and understanding of facts  or information. Wisdom is the ability to apply knowledge to your life.

I thought it would be appropriate to post a poem from someone who has gone before us and seemed to have lots of wisdom.  Erma Bombeck.  So on this day, let's learn from someone who , if had the chance, would do things a little differently.  

IF I HAD LIFE TO LIVE OVER

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.

I would have eaten popcorn in the "GOOD" living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.

I would have cried less while watching television and laughed more while watching life.

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away 9 months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment realizing that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, "Later. Now go get washed up for dinner."

There would have been more "I love yous"...more "I'm sorrys"...but mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it...live it...and never give it back.

Erma Bobeck

Now THAT'S WISDOM!

Always encouraging you,

Letha

The Buck Stops Here ~ The Responsibility Decision

This winter at The Healthy Weigh we're traveling through time! We are "visiting" 7 prominent historical characters during the next 9 weeks, each of whom will teach us a valuable life lesson. Our theme comes from the book "The Travelers Gift" by Andy Andrews.  This week we visited Harry Truman, our 33rd President.  President Truman made the phrase "The Buck Stops Here" famous. The buck stops here, meaning responsibility is not passed on beyond this point.

One of the most pervasive myths in the American culture today is that we are entitled to a great life. That somehow, someone (certainly not us) is responsible for filling our lives with continual happiness, exciting career options, nurturing family time, and blissful relationships simply because we exist.

But the real truth, and the lesson we are going to be learning over the next weeks to come, is that there is only one person responsible for the quality of the life you live.

That person is you.

If you want to be successful at anything, you have to take 100% responsibility for everything that you experience in your life. This includes the level of your achievements, the results you produce, the quality of your relationships, the state of your health and physical fitness, your income, your debts, your feelings...everything!

That is not easy.

In fact, most of us have been conditioned to blame something outside of ourselves for the parts of our life we don't like. We blame our parents, our bosses, our friends, the media, our co-workers, our clients, our spouse, the weather, the economy, the President, our lack of money...anyone or anything we can pin the blame on. We never want to look at where the real problem is, ourselves.

To really be successful you have to give up all your excuses! If you want to create the life of your dreams, then you are going to have to take 100% responsibility for your life as well. That means giving up all your excuses, all your victim stories, all the reasons why you can't and why you haven't up until now, and all your blaming of outside circumstances. You have to give them up forever!

You have to take the position that you have always had the power to make it different, to get it right, to produce the desired result. For what ever reason, you chose not to exercise that power. Who knows why? It doesn't matter. The past is the past. All that matters now is that from this point forward you choose to act as if you are 100% responsible for everything that does or doesn't happen to you.  

If something doesn't turn out as planned, you will ask yourself, "How did I create that? What was I thinking?  What were my beliefs?  What did I say or not say? What do I need to do differently next time to get the results I want?"

It's simple.

You are the one who is creating your life the way it is. The life you currently live is the result of all of your past thoughts and actions. You are in charge of your current thoughts and your present feelings. You are in charge of what you say and what you do. You are also in charge of what goes into your mind. That's great news!

We must be willing to say...

"I accept responsibility for my past. I control my thoughts. I control my emotions. I am responsible for my success. The buck stops here!"

Until next week when we meet with King Solomon,

Always encouraging you,

Letha