Flat Tires and Happiness!

I read a story about a man that was driving one night to deliver a speech. He got a flat tire. With not enough time to call for a tow truck, he tried to change the tire on his own.  He missed the important speech, disappointed an audience, lost money and had a miserable evening. The next day when he spoke to his friend,  he wasn't particularly unhappy about all of this. "I am convinced that each of us has a flat-tire quota," he told his friend, "and I had never had a flat tire before."

Many people would have been considerably more unhappy than him in that situation. Why wasn't he more unhappy? Because he had a philosophy of life that provided him with perspective. We determine how much we will allow something to make us unhappy. That we can determine our emotional response to events is hard for many people to acknowledge. Most people think that events make them unhappy, that their happiness level is dictated by what happens to them, but this is untrue.

In my studies of happiness, one of the most significant conclusions I have drawn is that there is little correlation between the circumstances of people's lives and how happy they are. We all know people who have a relatively easy life and who are unhappy, and we know people who have suffered a great deal but maintenance a high level of happiness.

One reason for this is the emotional and psychological disposition with which people are born or that they develop early in life. But innate disposition is not the only explanation for their differing reactions to life. At least as often it is a person's attitude and philosophy of life that determines his or her level of happiness.

We are going to look at two more habits or rituals to add to our lives that put us in a posture to experience more happiness.

5. Do something nice for one special person each week. This kind deed can be physical (helping with a chore) emotional, (buying a book or giving counsel) or spiritual (having devotions/praying together.)

This is a big one...but no more important than the rest of the list. It's amazing what happens when you get your eyes off yourself for a time each week. We have never had a time in our history where people need more encouragement and help. Offer some up. See what a difference it makes in your life. We feel connected when we focus on others, when we encourage or support them. Even listening...really listening to someone will not only help them, but can really put our lives into perspective as well. Zig Zigler said," If you help enough people get what they want...you'll get what you want." In this case...happiness.


6. Spend some time each week having fellowship and fun with at least one or two like minded friends of the same sex. If you are married, have fun with other married couples. In this way, husbands and wives can benefit from intimacy with others.

This one sounds a little funny...of the same sex...but it is true. It is important that our relationships with the opposite sex are reserved, if married, for our spouse, and if not, for a future promise of one. Relationships with the same sex meets a need that we can't get met in other ways.  Men need to connect in recreational/outdoors/sports with other guys. Women need emotional connections and conversation with other women. We are born for relationships.


We have looked at 6 of the 7 habits of a person who knows that happiness is a choice and happiness takes work. Keep referring back to the list. Keep asking yourself, how many of these am I participating in? I will promise you that by actively pursing happiness you will have a shift in your thinking and your philosophy of life.

Here's to a flat-tire quota!

Always encouraging you,
Letha